Sorry for the all these negative words on the title. It is not for expressing negative feelings but for reclaiming that those words are actually useless, hopeless to reconsider and meaningless to rethink.
Today is a holiday. So it seems that everybody is enjoying this long weekend sunbathing on the green grass and taking a walk on Palermo Soho street. Actually I have not asked why today is holiday, but just guessed that today is Columbus day as my US calendar indicated. If it is also as it is in Latin America, I raise my doubt why they still celebrate their day of being invaded and attacked morally, racially and physically. Even in the academic world where the change of paradigm is everlasting, the term DISCOVERY of Latin America has altered to ENCOUNTER of two different worlds, and more revoluationally to the term ENCOVERY which is now to consider as the furtherest sophistifaction.
None of those above really matters (not in academic field but in daily encounter), when it comes to see people’s relaxation that reflects on their eyes. People’s laugh that bursts through-passing their white teeth and reddish lips. Simple happiness that can be observed on holiday not only relates to labour condition but also represents (most-likely occidental and capitalistic) consumption culture, social interraction as the way people gather and share time and item. We all deserve such happiness, without a single doubt to mention, but do all of us practice to do such?
As a man with island-antecedent-childhood background, I solely have argued that the people of islands (maybe in broader sense, United Kingdom, Japan and Australia also fall into its categorisation) have tendency to internalise the solitude as a basic human feeling. It seems natural to feel lonely sometimes, as we all are located away from another, sharing only one humane factor that connects us all down below submarine. Many others, of continents and peninsulas, feel the loneliness as a treatable mental disease so they end up using pills, heavy drugs or other people(from prostitution to love).
Examining solitude, which is a quite vague and nondefinitive idea, has been a necessity for me to overcome it through. I sliced it into some different chops: (1) feeling useless and left out, (2) insecurity in communicating with others and (3) fear of being rejected. We feel quite lonely when we count no productive activities. After work, being back home for example, if there is nothing to do but to think that there is nothing left for oneself, one feels lonely (case 1). In that case one might come up with an idea to realise, but once again, it is better to do it with others than by oneself (case 2). Furtherly, when it is programmed to do such activities with others but they cancel to show up or reject to share, we also feel lonely (case 3).
This specification of such causes of solitude helps us prevent, bypass and superb the solitude that one expriences. The advice seems now far easier: a productive hobby is needed which contains a group interaction. Reading a book and watching a movie would be excluded as a hobby in this sense (well actually those are not anyhow considered as hobbies). One creates its own solitude and when one complains it means that s/he is just doing none. Maybe in this sense, Crossfit became a quite fashion among men, and Instagram also occupies in high rank of social network since it requires efforts to take photographs and share those. But both of those activities don’t solve the thrid cause, the fear of rejection. You can enroll but you might not be liked or be able to follow the high standard after mental competitions. So in conclusion, all we do is because we feel lonely and even doing so it seems hard to superb that feeling.
It is understandable that the solitude connects with existencial crisis. I myself at some points of my life was in such crisis, trying to find the meaning of life. When one sees no meaning of his/her life, a possible existencial crisis follows. Many religions have said that life does not contain a meaning: in the way the meaning lays in afterlife or there were none from the beginning: We came from the dust and go back to it, simply. Hermann Hesse quoted it well in his novel, Steppenwolf, saying: by growing up you will notice that this world does not need a hero who is ready to act and sacrifice for the many. Life is not a heroic epic, but just a place where normal people gather to drink, dance and chat meaningless thing all nights. Maybe the existencial crisis is needed when one births its transition from heroic imagination to adaptive normal drinker of late night bar. Am I diminishing human capacity where still many heros are worshiped, as of Tusk, Jobs or Zuckerberg? Maybe, or maybe not.
Also it became too cliché that instead of finding the meaning of life we should create one. We should love more, than just expect to be loved. Blah blah. All these human behaviour formatting quotes became business, in meditation, in religion, in consumption derived from magazines and commercials, in audiovisual products we call art and culture, in food, and most importantly in forming identity. We do have plenty reasons to feel solitude, yes, we are designed to feel that way every moment. Do you count a wayout?